Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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