i just wanna soil my oats bro
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
And then he peed in my hair
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