I wish I only lived at night.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
