Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize