What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
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