can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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