i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
