i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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