There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
