Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
