she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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