Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
It's just like the Real World with babies
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
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