so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
