none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize
