you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
third nipple confirmed
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
