:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
