I am spending my child support on dildos
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
