genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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