I think scott just propositioned me for sex
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
