Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
