She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
