nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
