go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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