a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
