I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
