So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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