Midget sex pt 2 tonight
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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