What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
