Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
