You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
