do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
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