I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
