I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
