But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
