she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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