I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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