omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
