I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I have demons in me.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
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