I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
