my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
