You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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