Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
