I puked a lego.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
