Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
