Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
