We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
