I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
