just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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