There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
