Pregnant stripper...not hot.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
